Ronald McDonald & Mason County Fair

Sometimes as an established comic and local personality thanks to the radio (and thanks to my superior choice in parents.) – I get hired to do things outside of comedy but still in the same family tree.

This weekend I got to Host the Mason County Fair. If you don’t know where Mason County is it’s by Shelton and if you don’t know where that is, than there’s a good reason for that. My job at the fair was to introduce the bands on stage. I introduced the first band and the lead singer comes up and says “thanks a lot, this first song I wrote for my son he just turned 2.” I’m thinking “oh this will be a nice song.” but he goes up there and just starts screaming. The most cookie monster type song. I don’t even know if there are lyrics. Just screaming. I’m thinking “How do you get inspired for that by your son? Do you scream at your kids a lot? and you’re like that will make a good song!” “AUGHHHHH IM NOT CHANGING ANOTHER GOD DAMN DIAPER!”

The Worst was right before that. The opening act for the fair was Ronald McDonald. Because it’s a fair. There’s kids there. So I go up to Ronald McDonald backstage to ask him what he would like for an introduction. I walk in the back and he’s in the mirror. SHADOWBOXING. Ronald McDonald is SHADOWBOXING. The only acceptable time to shadowbox is if you’re a boxer. Sometimes you see comedians do it. If you ever walk in here and see one of these guys tonight shadowboxing. I want you to box them in real life. but RONALD MCDONALD? You work with Kids! I know it’s awful, but I don’t want you imagining to beat them up before you go out there. “Yeah Take THAT TIMMY!”