Brett Favre’s Small Penis
That outta get some SEO traffic in here 🙂
This is an old twisted tune my dad did. It’s a parody of “Hootie and the Blowfish” called “Three Inch Tool” by Bob Rivers
Later on I’ll re post and re tweet some of my favorite little penis jokes I’ve heard from friends. but first let’s talk about football a little bit.
I think its so funny how football players celebrate the little things. I was watching the game and the running back scored on about a 1/2 yard run then did this giant dance routine. I understand your happy, and its ok to celebrate, but did it need to be that elaborate for such a short run? Congratulations on your 2 foot touchdown, but it wasn’t that big of a deal. A simple finger in the sky could have sufficed. Talk about role models. Kids are going to jump up from their desk and do the stanky leg when they get 1+1 right on a math test. Yeah, I understand that I could never score a touchdown from 1 foot out, even if the other team was the Seahawks but still this guy is capable of more and should act like it.
Anyway. By now many of you have heard or seen that pictures of Brett Favre’s junk leaked all over the internet. Before we get into the best of. Here’s what I don’t understand. WHO DOES THAT? Seriously? Cock Shots are all the rage. I don’t get it one bit. That just shows poor decision making. Now, look. As a man it sucks that it’s mainly our responsibility to initiate interest. I’m sympathetic to that fact because I’m a man. As men we understand good percentage of the time, you’re just going to get shot down. No matter what happens. Sometimes girls like to play hard to get. I’ve had a few instances where a girl told me I would “NEVER” sleep with her and then we actually ended up together. but if a girl is playing hard to get, I really don’t think showing a girl a picture of your dick is going to help. ESPECIALLY if it’s small. The most I can compromise is that maybe if you’re in a relationship with a girl, or you’re married, then maybe it’s an ok idea to send her pictures. If that’s what she likes, or if she’s shown interest in your penis at one point. Fine. but if a girl has rejected you, ignored your phone calls, not responded to messages over a couple days. It’s probably a sign that she’s not interested and just leave it at that. Your dick isn’t going to help that situation. You’re married. You’re a celebrity. and YOUR PENIS IS TINY!
I have a joke about cock shots from craigslist in my act, although now to be clean I saw “all my pictures were from the waist down.” which still does great. Sometimes I’ll text a girl and joke around and ask her if she wants a picture of my cock. This is the picture I send her. Now. Let me state that I love my penis. I’m not embarassed by it at all, but I would still NEVER send a picture of it to anyone. I think.
Now on to the best of – Note: I’m staying away from the easy ones and the bad puns “fumbling balls” “came up short” “intercepted” “no wonder he wears #4” – annnnnd continuing on:
Via Pedro Bartes:
Yesterday was Brett Favre’s birthday and if you saw his pics, you can probably guess was his wish was when he blew the candles….
I just saw the infamous Brett Favre’s pics, and yes, no wonder he left Green Bay, he is definetely not a packer….Minnesotta must be really cold….
Via Andy Haynes (while the game was being delayed for thunderstorms):
Brett Favre’s dick better be careful around all this lightning.
Via Owen Straw:
Brett Favre throws it to the other team. A situation his wife is familiar with.
His interception for a jets touchdown EXTENZE their lead to 9
That’s all for now folks. Send me your best one. It’s 11:45. Meaning I continue with the streak of writing a few jokes a day. I know I know it’s a huge post and not much original jokes of my own. but hey. It’s like day 6 or 7 now. Im running thin on new premises 🙂