Archive for December, 2011

My senior photo

Big Boy Underpants

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This may come as a surprise to most of you, but I wasn’t that popular in high school. (Maybe that’s why I’m here. How do you like me now? Still no? Ok.) I wasn’t a loser, I just didn’t care about all of it. Which is the worst kind of unpopular. If I had died [...]
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Bob is Back!

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My dad is on the radio in Seattle and He does a morning show from 6 to 10am. I can’t imagine you’ve arrived here and don’t know anything about me. So just keep that in mind for this next story. We were having a holiday party for my friends business. We were bowling. From there [...]
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Chirstmas Party Video

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So my dad throws a christmas party ever year with a comedian and his band. This was the first year I was invited to perform, and open for Richard Lewis. I’ve worked with him before and he’s always had nice things to say. Anyway, the shows are always sponsored by worldvision who my dad does [...]
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Breaking Bad Kirkland Edition

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I want to clarify something before you read the rest of this. I use the term “roommate” loosely in this story. I don’t know this chick. I didn’t ask her to move in. I didn’t sign a lease with her. I live in a house, and rent a room in it that I found on [...]
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Porn Selection

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When I look back and reflect. I realize sometimes I’m more selective with porn than actual girls I’ve slept with. At the end of the night, I will go home, I will spend an hour picking out the perfect movie. Looking through the thumbnails, fast forwarding through to the end to make sure no weird [...]
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Gangsta Rap Made Me Do It!

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My dad has a theory that rap music taught me to objectify women at a young age and that’s why I’m still single. I disagree. These bitches just don’t know what they’re missing. Besides, Classic Rockers invented the groupie. MY PEOPLE just improved upon the design. Don’t get mad because IBM made a better typewriter. [...]
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The Titus Story

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Here’s the short story: I met titus a little under 3 years ago when I had done 5 open mics. He encouraged me. Gave me advice and I never forgot it. Last October he came to town. I got to meet him backstage. He encouraged me again. We BS’d for a while. He said good [...]
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